Rupert Street. Not a bad bar for meeting mates but the toilets have always been a disgrace. Sometimes a good disgraceful, but generally a pretty make sure you've had your Tetanus jab before heading down there to be perved upon by an array of out of towners disgrace.
"Continue reading" to find out what we found down there...
We didn't find a refurbished pleasure palace with Go Go boys offering free drugs to a backing track of Hello Dolly. Nope, today we went down to find a Toilet Nazi. A Mr Jigyy Jiggy we had no time for as we weren't off our face.
Yup, you head down into one of their cubicles swimming in piss wondering whether sitting on a cum sodden metal toilet seat which has pubes hanging of it and wonder if this is what you really need right now. But, now you leave - well, try to leave as often your feet stick and you need to put some effort into moving - and there's a guy being very forthright and demanding money with knock-off aftershave menaces.
At least clean the fucking toilets if you're going to demand cash.
Top tips for not paying lollipop weilding after shave confidence tricksters in toilets:
1. Say "no thanks, get a mop and clean the place".
2. Leave clutching your phone looking very busy yelling I'M BI, BI!
3. Stay at the urinal being a total toilet troll drinking G from a jam jar stopping only to pop your dodgy eye back in.